About backbiting and speaking ill of others (1)
Those who do not commit sins and have been gifted with safety (from sins) should take pity on sinners and other disobedient people. Gratefulness should be mostly their indulgence and it should prevent them from (finding faults with) others. What about the backbiter who blames his brother and finds fault with him? Does he not remember that Allah has concealed the sins which he committed while they were bigger than his brother's sins pointed out by him? How can he vilify him about his sins when he has himself committed one like it? Even if he has not committed a similar sin he must have committed bigger ones. By Allah, even if he did not commit big sins but committed only small sins, his exposing the sins of people is itself a big sin.
O' creature of Allah, do not be quick in exposition anyone's sin for he may be forgiven for it, and do not feel yourself safe even for a small sin because you may be punished for it. Therefore, every one of you who comes to know the faults of others should not expose them in view of what he knows about his own faults, and he should remain busy in thanks that he has been saved from what others have been indulging in.
(1). The habit of fault finding and backbiting has become so common
that even the feeling of its evilness has disappeared. And at
present neither the high avoid it nor the low; neither the high
position of the pulpit prevents it nor the sacredness of the mosque.
Whenever a few companions sit together their topic of conversation
and engaging interest is just to discuss the faults of their opponents
with added colourisation, and to listen to them attentively. Although
the fault finder is himself involved in the faults which he picks
up in others, yet he does not like that his own faults should
be exposed. In such a case, he should have consideration for similar
feelings in others and should avoid searching for their faults
and hurting their feelings. He should act after the proverb: "Do
not do unto others what you do not want others to do unto you."
Backbiting is defined as the exposure of the fault of a brother-in-faith
with the intent to vilify him in such a way as to irritate him,
whether it be by speaking, acting, implication or suggestion.
Some people take backbiting to cover only that which is false
or contrary to fact. According to them to relate what was seen
or heard, exactly as it was, is not backbiting, and they say that
they are not backbiting but only relating exactly what they saw
or heard. But in fact backbiting is the name of this very relating
of the facts, because if it is not factually correct it would
be false accusation and wrong blame. It is related about the Prophet
that he said:
There are many causes for indulging in backbiting, and because
of this a man commits it sometimes knowingly and sometimes unknowingly.
Abu Hamid al-Ghazali has recounted these causes in detail in his
book Ihya' `ulumu'd-din. A few of the important ones are:
However, in some cases fault finding or criticising does not fall
under backbiting.
"Do you know what backbiting is?" People said, "Allah
and His Prophet know better." Then he said, "Backbiting
means that you say about your brother a thing which pains him."
Someone said, "But what if I say what is actually true about
him?" The Prophet replied, "It is backbiting only when
it is factually true, otherwise you would be accusing him falsely."