Manner of Thinking and Its Effects

Several thoughts which are not based on intellect affect the lives of the youths and we must fight against them. We shall cite a few of them:

1. Everyone should like my work and accept my views.

2. I should always succeed and never face setbacks.

3. If the work is not as per my liking it is worthless.

These thoughts cause misfortune and bitterness in the lives of youths. This is not caused by external factors but conditions that exist within us. It is obvious that every work cannot be as per our wishes. Hence, we should find an appropriate solution instead of being remorseful. If we think that all tasks should be carried out exactly the way we wish - failing which we will be depressed, it will create restlessness in us and distance us from realistic thinking. If we think that:

1. I should be free of all errors and mistakes or I will not be successful: This thought will create turmoil in the youth and will affect his ability and his will power. He will be a victim of inferiority complex, deem himself worthless and feel insecure and lazy.

2. Everyone should love and respect me. If it is not so then I am not a good human being: This will bring about anger, hatred, irate behavior and bad manners in youths.

All my friends, colleagues and near and dear ones should take care of me and provide me with means of comfort. They should accept all my views at once. I cannot tolerate more than this. In short everyone should be at me beck and call. This feeling will deprive the youth from the ability of facing failures, strain his heart and he will be dissatisfied with his conditions. He will always repent and feel lazy and inactive.

Are any of the above thoughts based on intellect? These inappropriate demands and emotions have a very profound effect on the behavior of our youths and causes mental illnesses in them.

Mental stress, inferiority complex and the behavior of others destroys the personality of youths and deprives them from creativity. It is necessary under such conditions that the youths reform their sentiments and impractical demands. He should eschew thinking that is not based on intellect; investigate the causes of his restlessness and treat them. Following things will be useful in this endeavor:

1. Do not be hasty while forming an opinion and making decision.

2. Do not view yourselves and others in the light of the work done by you or others.

"Since people do not respect me, I am not a nice person." Do not make the results of actions as a criterion for people being good or bad. The results should purely be based on our efforts. Expect from people as per their capacity. Experience, efforts and hard work, piety and forward thinking can be taken as criteria for actions being righteous or otherwise.

Do not criticize or reproach others. If need arises, be critical about the work and not the person, for mistakes can be rectified. It is the work which is bad not the person and do not hurt him. Give benefit of doubt to others.

If we change our thinking from being irrational and unreasonable and forego inappropriate demands, we will find rest and peace, relief from stress and our lives will be pleasant.