My son is turning 18 and he does not give me the respect due to a mother. As I have done what was due from Allah, is it alright for me to ignore him now?
No you can never ignore your child, you must be a role model and an example. If he is disrespectful there might be a reason, nobody grows up to become disrespectful by themselves. You must understand the reasons behind, and see the bigger picture. All of us react differently and even our child may grow up to become totally different than us, but we must continue to love them unconditionally and show them a path of beauty and compassion. Imam Zayn al-Abideen as-Sajjad (alayhi salam) taught us that only goodness can erase evil, and it is very beneficial to read his dua makarim al-akhlaq every day, especially when you are going through hardship.
Keep in mind these phares:
“Make me worship You
but do not let my worship be corrupted by conceit.
Let good flow out from my hands for people,
but do not let me erase it by making them feel obliged.
Grant me the highest moral traits,
but protect me from vanity.
O Allah, bless Muhammad and his family,
Raise me not a single degree with people
unless You have lowered me an equal amount,
whithin myself.”
“O Allah, bless Muhammad and the family of Muhammad.
Replace for me;
the enimity of the people of hatred with love,
the jealousy of the rebellious people with affection,
the suspicion of the virtuous people with confidence
the enmity of the close ones with friendship,
the disrespect of relatives to devotion,
the desertion of the close ones with help,
the attachment of flatterers with reformed regard,
the rejection of associates with good behaviour,
and the bitterness of the fear of oppressors
with the sweetness of security.
O Allah, bless Muhammad and his family,
Give me,
a hand (power) over one wrongs me,
a tongue over one who disputes with me,
and a victory over one who stubbornly resists me.
Grant me,
craftiness against one who deceives me,
power over one who oppresses me,
refutation of one who accuses me falsely,
and safety from one who threatens me.
Give me the success to,
obey one who directs me to what is proper
and follow one who guides me to what is right.”
You must find it in yourself to love him, and let your love erase his errors. You must find it in yourself to be an example of compassion and patience.