Zaid Alsalami

Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from ANU, Canberra. He has written and translated several Islamic texts and also prepared educational videos on Islamic rulings and practices.

157539

Bismihi ta'ala

You and your family should not rely on istikharah for making the decision of marriage. Istikharah should not be the primary tool to be used for marriage selection. 

The age gap that you mentioned is not really a major issue, and could be overlooked, if there is compatibility and commonalities and attraction towards each other.

However, as you said there is no attraction, and you do not have that certainty in this marriage proposal, then I would recommend you not rush into this, and not allow your parents to pressure you. 

You have every right to decline this proposal as well, and if you are doing the right thing, you wont need to regret in the future.

For marriage, the important thing is him being religious, having good morals, good reputation, and there being compatibility between you and him. 

Sit with him, once or twice, or even three times, and ask the right questions, especially about future plans and what your ambitions and goals are, and how his views agree with you or not, and then make your decision. Not based on istikharah, but based on the information you have.

With prayers for your success.

157617

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 9 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

No, it will not be rewarding. It could be haram as well, as in most, if not all Muslim societies this is unacceptable and socially inappropriate. In our Islamic law, it is called "libas al-shuhrah", which means dressing or wearing something that will invite criticism, negative comments, accusations, or ruining of reputation. 

In general, a male wearing earrings does definitely fall under the category of libas al-shuhrah, which means it would be haram. 

If it is confirmed that the Imam (a.s.) did have his ear pierced as a child, it does not mean he wore earrings, or kept on wearing it as an adult. We do not have any evidence for that. 

And, even if it was done then, for argument sake, it might have been something common then, like men having kohl on their eyes as well, but now, it is uncommon and unpracticed, especially among religious people. 

And Allah knows best. 

157648

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 9 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

As we have high esteeemed regards and reverence to the Ahlul Bayt (a.s.), and venerate and respect them very much, we avoid prying into things that have absolutely no benefit for us. 

When we think of the Ma'sumeen (a.s.), we must think of them in a lofty way, keep away from intrusive thoughts, or questions that won't have any benefit at all. 

However, to answer this question, there are some scholars who believe they did not use the restroom, and did not need to relieve themselves. 

Other scholars say they are humans, similar to other humans, as the Quran says, and that there are narrations that mention the Prophet (s.a.w.) leaving somewhere, covering his head, and was for the purpose of using the toilet. 

We as Shi'ah do believe that nobody at all had ever seen the Ma'sumeen (a.s.) relieve themselves. 

We also believe that Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) have been purified, as Ayatul-Tathir [Quran, 33:33] says. This could mean, as some interpret, that if they did relieve themselves, it would not be impure. 

In any case, we should focus on what we can learn from Ahlul Bayt (a.s). This matter has no use whatsoever, and is usually brought up by shallow individuals who divert away from the core teachings of our Imams (a.s.).

And Allah knows best

157653

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 9 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Firstly, I would recommend you watch this presentation, and although it might be bit technical for her, you would be able to hopefully explain it in a way that she understands:

Basically, in Arabic language, pronouns do not always necessarily need to refer to gender, and we most certainly know that Allah ta'ala is above gender, but we must refer to Him with something. 

In the English language, he/she in most cases only refers to gender, so the problem could be due to the language as well. Whatever the case may be, we still need to address Almighty God with something, as long as we know and understand that it is not a gender based usage, because Almighty God does not have a body or a gender. 

And Allah knows best

157740

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 9 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

We believe that the names, titles and kunyahs (teknonym) of our Ma'sumeen (a.s.) and certain eminent members of their family are chosen by Allah ta'ala. It was also a custom among Arabs at that time to give a kunyah to a person who didnt have a child with that name. 

Imam Muhammad al-Jawad (a.s.) has kunyah of Abu Ja'far, and he did not have a child by the name of Abu Ja'far. 

Imam al-Mahdi (a.a.f.) has the kunyah Aba Saleh, and he does not have children.

Imam al-Sadiq (a.s.) has kunyah of Abu Abdillah, but his elder son was Isma'il. Although he did have a son by the name Abdullah (al-Aftah), but it would not be possible for the Imam to have that kunyah for that reason, because Abdullah al-Aftah was deviant. 

As for Imam Husain (a.s.), his kunyah was also Abu Abdillah, and it is not clear exactly why, but it has been explicitly mentioned from the Messenger of God (s.a.w.). One narration says that the Prophet (s.a.w.) used this kunyah with Imam Husain (a.s.) when he was at the age of two. 

Therefore, his kunyah has been transmitted as such, from the Prophet (s.a.w.), and of course what the Prophet does is from Allah ta'ala.

And Allah knows best

157870

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 9 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

1. I would recommend you learn as much as you can about Islamic jurisprudence, and the method of selecting a Marja' Taqleed. This lesson will in shaa Allah help you: 

2. Once you have developed a good understanding of selecting a Marja' taqleed, you will know that it is important to follow the "most learnt", and most commonly followed. 

3. Should you have any further questions, speak to your local qualified scholar.

With prayers for your success

156488

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 10 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Other than the holy Quran, we do not have a book that is completely authentic, from cover to cover. Even our early hadith books like al-Kafi, etc, are to be individually evaluated and scrutinised by experts of hadith grading. 

The great book Bihar al-Anwar, by al-'Allamah al-Majlisi (q.s.) is no exemption as well. As for percentage or proportion, that cannot be defined as a whole, because each scholar could have different methodology of grading authenticity, and other related issues to hadith grading.

And Allah knows best

156500

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 10 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Location should not affect the ability to weep and shed tears for Imam Husain (a.s.), as when you hear the musibah of Ahlul Bayt (a.s.), you should completely zone out from everything else and express your grief. 

Of course, it is always best to attend Majalis in person, participating in the mourning ceremonies with other believers and increasing the number of devotees who commemorate the tragedy of Karbala. 

And Allah knows best

156569

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 10 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Yes, if it is crucial information and would affect the success of the marriage, and you are asked for your input, you must be honest. 

This situation is among the cases where gheebah (backbiting) is permissible, or maybe could even be obligatory. 
Of course, you must be careful that it does not somehow backlash onto you as well. 

And Allah knows best

156606

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 10 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

According to our Shi'i fiqh, it is makruh to fast on Ashura` day. 

And Allah knows best

156673

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 10 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

This would depend on the method of how it was set. Was it a vow, recited in the shar'i formula, or not? 

If it was a vow, your father is able to release you from it. Please refer to detailed Ahkam books for further explanation.

And Allah knows best

156705

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 10 months ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Yes, the 'iddah period must still be observed by the wife, even though a long time has passed from their separation, as long as she is not ya`isah. 

It is three menstrual cycles, and she does not necessarily need to do anything. The only thing she cannot do at all is get remarried during this time. 

Please refer to detailed Ahkam books for further explanations.

And Allah knows best