Materialism is a form of philosophical monism that holds that matter is the fundamental substance in nature, and that all things, including mental states and consciousness, are results of material interactions. According to philosophical materialism, mind and consciousness are by-products or epiphenomena of material processes (such as the biochemistry of the human brain and nervous system), without which they cannot exist. This concept directly contrasts with idealism, where mind and consciousness are first-order realities to which matter is subject and material interactions are secondary.
Bismillah, Salaam alaykum, If someone is making material demands of you, knowing that you can’t afford it, then this can be a psychological way of devaluing you as a person, especially if this is done in front of your children. If it is done in front of your children, then this can be a form of parental alienation. I can suggest you go on youtube and look up ‘traits of the female narcissist’. There is a channel called Narcisssistic Abuse Healing and the title is 12 Typical Behaviors Of A Female Narcissist.
Thank you for your question. There is no dichotomy between a virtuous spouse and success in the material world. In fact, the virtues taught by Islam enable the most beautiful of lives. Good character traits also include hard work, a sense of responsibility, and independence. The goal is not to hide from the world, but to have a strong enough relationship with God so as to not be stained by its negative aspects. That in itself is a journey.
May you always be successful