You must tolerate and keep on tolerating no matter how much and how long your mother interferes or controls. Never show any reaction against her and avoid any word or less which can hurt your mother's feelings and dignity as your mother.
It would depend upon what music is being played; what lyrics there are. Rulings on music among scholars are diverse. Ayatollah Sistani says that it is not permissible to listen to music that is used for frivolous entertainment or sexual provocation, meaning that music that is NOT used for frivolous entertainment or sexual provocation may be listened to; for example, music that is composed to praise God. Interestingly, even the same ruling exists in Buddhism. You should have a discussion with the teacher to ask what kind of music they intend to teach, as unfortunately nowadays children are exposed to many indecent and adult-level sounds and images, even at school.
Mistreating any of the parents is very dangerous and it is a major sin which leads the sinner to hellfire beside causing misery in his life in this world. Parents need to study the reasons of this misbehaviour and try their best to make their children understand what is right and what is wrong. One of the possible reasons can be bad friends or watching bad films etc.
It is really a big challenge for the parents and they need to take advice from specialists beside seeking help from Allah (SWT).
There is no Kaffara on non Baligh child, but if his parents wish to pay a Kaffara, they can do so but it is not obligatory neither on them nor on the child.
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