Husband

A husband is a male in a marital relationship. The rights and obligations of a husband regarding his spouse and others, and his status in the community and in law, vary between cultures and have varied over time.

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Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 1 year ago

If there are physical items involved (talismans, or that sort of thing) in your home, you can destroy them.

However, in general, unlike with Amazon, there are no returns in the department of the unseen - it is easier to do than to undo.

If whatever the person did had some effect, and wasn't just fakery, sometimes you can just wait it out as these things can wear down over time. 

If you or he are suffering ill effects (for instance, he is not thinking clearly, it has backfired and caused conflict because he is now hyper-dependent, or you have a haunted house now), you could go to someone who is honest, trustworthy, and capable who does ruqya or who can advise you on how to do it on yourselves to help remove the ill effects.

However, that might be awkward to explain to your husband and cause more problems - most people are enraged if they find out someone attempted to do magic on them.

If it is just regret, but you don't have any reason to think there is anything actually harming either of you, it may be better to leave the situation as it is and to focus on building a positive home life and also looking after both of your material and spiritual well-being (religion, health, etc). 

In general, regular recitation of Qur'an, regular salat, and playing Qur'an in the background in the home can help to calm down unwanted bad effects and bolster people against the effects of black magic. Of course, praying to Allah for assistance is good.

Sometimes in life we make decisions we regret.

Also sorry to hear about the cheating. 

Infidelity and sorcery are signs that a marriage is not at its healthiest. If there are some other underlying difficulties in the marriage, unrelated to those two issues, maybe you could look into some kind of marriage therapy or counseling.

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Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answer updated 1 year ago

It is normal for there to be complex emotions in these situations. Even in narrations, it says that a woman's jealousy over her husband is due to her love for him. This is apart from other concerns, such as about the financial effect.

There is nothing wrong with acknowledging the reality of your emotions. In any situation, is healthier to work through things such as anger or resentment because negative emotions can eat at us, and we are the ones who will suffer. However, this takes time and there isn't an instant fix. 

Bringing another person into the picture (either in terms of a second wife, or illicitly) also changes the relationship between two spouses, and it takes time for the relationship to adjust and to find a new normal. Also, sometimes it changes our own sense of identity and the way we relate to the world, since marriage is heavily tied to identity, and so sometimes it takes time to develop a different sense of self if there is a change in marital life. 

There is a certain wisdom in accepting that we cannot control other people's decisions, and to accept that people in our lives will do things that we wish they didn't. Allah only takes us to account for our own actions and choices. 

Ethically, it is good to treat correctly the other woman in the same way one would treat correctly any other person, especially if she is a sister in faith. 

In societies which are not structured to support polygyny, such as many urban areas today, and where it is a burden for a man to be equally responsible to two separate households, second marriages often don't last anyway, especially if the second wife is getting the lesser end of the deal (for instance, supporting herself and her children financially while the first wife is a housewife). (This is especially the case when the first marriage has been established for a long time and is not ending, and there isn't a strong reason pushing the man to take an additional wife.)

When the Prophet (S) and Imam Ali (A) had multiple wives, they didn't have to commute 4 hours in bad traffic after a 10 hour work shift and pay insurance and mortgages or exorbitant rent for both families, etc. The culture also was set up in a way that acknowledged polygamy, whereas some modern cultures are not even favorable to having one wife and child-raising, let alone multiple wives. Of course, this varies tremendously from place to place. 

Sometimes second/third/fourth marriages do last, and I don't want to give you a false hope, but just putting this out there. Time shows the end result of all things. 

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 1 year ago

Culture of today which is mainly from the western media makes people thing wrong about some acts which were been approved and even practiced by the Prophet (SAWA) and Ahlul Bayt (AS). If the western values calls your husband's second marriage with the condition of practical justice, a betrayal to you, then how do you look at a great lady like Ummul Banin (SA) who accepted many marriage of her husband Ameerul Mo'mineen (AS)?

Being unhappy with your husband's second marriage should not lead you to sinful acts like hurting him or accusing him or his second wife or her family or creating problems in the life of your husband even by changing your mode with him. You as a sincere believer in Allah, should accepts whatever Allah Has approved, and never show unhappiness with an act approved by Allah.

Your patience and acceptance to Allah's religion will give you a higher degree and great reward and will definitely make your life more successful.

Wassalam.

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 1 year ago

Allah (SWT) The Most Merciful Will grant the believers in Paradise what ever they wish, as we read in Quran (Sura 43, Verse 71) and also in Sura 50, Verse 35.

That does not mean that all the believers in Paradise are in the same degree or rank. Degrees and ranks in Paradise are according to good deeds.

A pious virgin in Paradise will be granted what she wishes according to her degree. Allah's Mercy is over all and it will be more than our imaginations.

Wassalam.

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 1 year ago

Muslim woman has to obey her husband in good things only and not in bad things. Bad things mean unlawful acts and harmful acts. There is no obedience for any creature in disobeying The Creator, Allah.

Wassalam.

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 1 year ago

You should always fulfill your responsibility to protect your kids from harmful things, and nothing more harmful and damaging than sinful acts. If your husband allows your kids sinful acts, that does mean that you have no responsibility to protect them. You must talk to him in a suitable way to prove to him that both of you are responsible to protect your kids. You also need to explain to your kids the as much they can understand the concept of good and bad. Your husband will not permit your kids to eat a sweet which contaminated with microbes because it is harmful for their health, so, how can he permit sinful acts which are more harmful?

Do whatever you can (with wisdom) to protect yourself and your family from Hellfire, as Allah said: O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones. Sura 66, Verse 6.

Wassalam.

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Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 1 year ago

Sorry to hear about your condition. If you need medical care, you should get medical care.

If you feel unable to tell your husband and need financial or practical assistance, maybe a friend, relative, or charitable organization can help you. 

With duas for your well-being. 

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 1 year ago

I have consulted a specialist who said that PCOS is not a difficult condition and it can be cured with correct treatment. In such case you do not need to inform your husband about it as far as the proper treatment is going on or will be started.

Wassalam.

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 1 year ago

Wife must obey her husband in matters which are permissible or recommended in Islam. Wife is not allowed to obey her husband if he orders her to leave an obligatory ( Wajib) or to do unlawful (Haraam). 
Exceptions are there when she is unable to do what he wants from her for health reasons.

Wassalam.

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 1 year ago

Husband's rights overrides parents' rights when both demand contradict. Wife must fulfill the rights of her husband after obeying Allah (SAWA). She has to always keep respecting and being nice to her parents.

Temporary marriage situation depends on the period agreed and the understanding between them. Short period marriage is not like long period marriage. In long period marriage wife needs to obey her husband as usual marriage but in short period marriage which was agreed just for sexual fulfilment, she has to fulfill her husband sexual needs then she is free in other matters of life like going out or working etc.

 Wassalam.

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Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answer updated 2 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

If this is the case that you are in, then such a relationship is not a healthy thing at all. You must try to find means of making him cease such conduct, if you have not yet tried, and then intervention, if that does not work. 

In my opinion, a wife does not deserve to be treated in such a way, and a husband being flirtatious with other women is certainly not the traits of a Muslim. 

Please watch this short clip on how a wife should deal with her promiscuous husband:

With prayers for your success

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

It is not allowed for any one to use sexual device for personal use.
It is allowed for husband and wife to use such devices for other spouse only.

If the sexual device is totally controlled remotely by the other spouse, then it will be allowed.

Wassalam.