Wife

A wife is a female partner in a continuing marital relationship.
The term continues to be applied to a woman who has separated from her partner, and ceases to be applied to such a woman only when her marriage has come to an end, following a legally recognized divorce or the death of her spouse. On the death of her partner, a wife is referred to as a widow, but not after she is divorced from her partner.

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Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answer updated 2 years ago

In Islam, a man should groom himself and look nice for his wife.

It is related from Imam Rida (A): "The women of Bani Israel deviated from the path of chastity because their men were not bothered about cleanliness and looking nice." The Imam then added: "What you expect of your wife, she expects the same from you."

It is also related that Allah is beautiful and loves beauty, and loves to see the signs of His blessings on His servants.

The Prophet (S) used to give attention to looking appropriate and presentable. Here are some narrations on some of his grooming habits, including combing and oiling his hair and beard: https://www.al-islam.org/sunan-nabi-sayyid-muhammad-husayn-tabatabai/cha...

Of course, different people have different levels of motivation and interest in these things, and different understandings of what it means to be tidy.

So yes, you can ask, and yes he should make some efforts. Even if it were not emphasized in Islam, it is still good to try to accomodate one's spouse's requests as long as they are ethical and doable. However, it is difficult to force someone to change. 

Perhaps you can encourage him, if you have not already, by giving him some nice beard oil. There are also some websites dedicated to beards and men who are proud of their beards. After all, a beard is a symbol of a manly man (for men who can grow them, of course) and so it is nice if he takes pride in it. 

Also since the beard is symbolic of Islam, it is nice to look after one's beard because it is part of the public image of Islam. 

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

It not allowed to do Mut'ah marriage with a female from People of Book (Ahlul Kitab) with out the permission of your Muslim wife.

Wassalam..

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Rebecca Masterton, Dr Rebecca Masterton graduated with a BA in Japanese Language and Literature; an MA in Comparative East Asian and African Literature and a PhD in Islamic literature of West Africa. She has been... Answer updated 2 years ago

Bismillah, Salaam alaykum, If someone is making material demands of you, knowing that you can’t afford it, then this can be a psychological way of devaluing you as a person, especially if this is done in front of your children. If it is done in front of your children, then this can be a form of parental alienation. I can suggest you go on youtube and look up ‘traits of the female narcissist’. There is a channel called Narcisssistic Abuse Healing and the title is 12 Typical Behaviors Of A Female Narcissist.

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Zoheir Ali Esmail, Shaykh Zoheir Ali Esmail has a Bsc in Accounting and Finance from the LSE in London, and an MA in Islamic Studies from Middlesex University. He studied Arabic at Damascus University and holds a PhD... Answered 2 years ago

Bismillah

Thank you for your question. The truth is that you can never fully know. Marriage means sharing a life path and many times that path has many unforeseen twists and turns. You won't be the same person 10 years from now and neither will your spouse. In all honesty we just make an educated guess, a leap of faith, we stack our chips and put the rest in Allah's hands. The reasons behind why marriage is like this is a mixture of modern attitudes and culture. Finding love is a process of growing together rather than finding a finished product. Everyone has faults and makes mistakes. There are certain qualities to look for but its only after going past the surface that you will get a picture of who you have really chosen. Some things will be as expected others will be disappointing but some things will be a pleasant surprise. Some problems will be your own doing and some successes will be unintentional. In the majority of cases marriage will work out will a good attitude, commitment, kindness, respect, giving each other space, showing love, and common goals. 
 

May you always be successful 

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

Wife is not allowed to refuse fulfilling her husband's sexual needs if she is not in her menstruation or post-natal or any other medical reason. Refusing intimacy with her husband is a sinful act.

Husband should try to nicely convince his wife including removing any reason which might have caused her to refuse intimacy. He should be very clean and wear perfume which she like and try to talk to her nicely to make her ready to respond to him.

After doing all that, if she continues to refuse intimacy with her husband, she might need counselling from trusted persons from her female relatives e.g. her mother, her sister etc.

She can be advised to seek guidance from trusted religious scholars or consultants.

Avoid using pressure on your wife because it might give wrong results. Intimacy in its best form is a result of a human delicate feeling, but if she is not ready for it in its best form, she should never deny giving her husband whatever she can to save him from thinking to go elsewhere to fulfill his natural needs. That is why Islam made it compulsory on the wife to offer what she can to meet the needs of her husband.

Wassalam .

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

Muslim married man is not allowed to do Mut'ah marriage with any woman from People of Book (Christians , Joes and Magi) with out permission from his Muslim wife.

You should try your best to travel to be with your wife at least once every four months, as it is not permissible to leave your young wife more that four months.

Wassalam.

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

Muslim married man is not allowed to go for Mut'ah marriage with a woman from People of Book (Christian, Joe, Magi) but after permission from his Muslim wife.

Wassalam.

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Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 2 years ago

I am sorry to hear about this situation. This is certainly despicable behavior from him and a breach of trust. 

It is difficult to have a marriage without trust. However, it is your decision whether or not you wish to stay in the marriage.

None of us here can give you good advice on whether or not to stay in the marriage without knowing your situation (both personally and also in terms of practical matters). It is best if you can discuss this with people who you know in person whom you trust, such as family or people whose advice you respect. 

Wishing you the best either way, and sorry you have to go through this.

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Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 2 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

In Shi'i jurisprudence, divorce has multiple conditions and requirements. 

1. You must specify what type of divorce it is. 

2. She must not be in her menstrual cycle, and you cannot divorce her if you have been intimate with her, which means you must way until she finishes her next cycle. 

3. The divorce must be conducted in front of at least 2 highly-pious men. 

4. The divorce formulate must be recited in correct Arabic, in the correct form.

5. Only 1 divorce can be given, which means a three-fold divorce in one setting is invalid. 

If are angry, suppress your anger and do not allow your anger to overwhelm you. Divorce is not to be done out of anger, and it is not an easy thing to do. When you are angry, observe the Islamic etiquette of what to do, and stay calm. 

If you have not met these conditions, then you are not divorced.

And Allah knows best. 

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Rebecca Masterton, Dr Rebecca Masterton graduated with a BA in Japanese Language and Literature; an MA in Comparative East Asian and African Literature and a PhD in Islamic literature of West Africa. She has been... Answered 2 years ago

In a word, 'no'. He is not allowed to do that. It is hoped that the couple can work toward understanding one another better, and sincerely find a solution that satisfies both parties.

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

Yes definitely. Husband is required to provide all livelihood needs for his wife including home, food, clothing, medication, etc. Even if the wife is rich, still her husband remains responsible in Islam to provide all her livelihood and housing needs for her.

Wassalam.

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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

He is not allowed to force her to do something more than the usual sexual intercourse which she does not like to do. 
Sexual intercourse is forbidden during menstrual period.

Oral sex is not obligatory on her.

Wassalam.