Girl

A girl is a young female, usually human, usually a child or an adolescent. When she becomes an adult, she is described as a woman. The term girl may also be used to mean a young woman, and is sometimes used as a synonym for daughter.

108733

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 years ago

Man does not need his parents permission for marriage, however, he needs to avoid hurting them or making them feel disrespected.

If you need to get married to save yourself from falling in sinful acts, you should go ahead and get married with a suitable believer female.

Wassalam.

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 2 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Unfortunately, many young adults face this same serious problem of certain parents with a wrong mindset preventing their son/daughter to get married, under the assumption that marriage will hinder their studies, or career prospects. 

We must invite people to adhere to our Islamic recommendations, and keep ourself immune from sin or engaging in illicit or secret relationships.

I would not advice you in any way to secretly get married, behind your parents. This is something that would not be to your benefit. Try to prove to your parents that you are ready for marriage. Show that you are mature, and you have the ability to combine between your college and having a partner. Even if it means your engagement period can be a bit long, but as long as you do not do something haram, or without your family's blessings.

With prayers for your success. 

108056

Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 2 years ago

The main underlying purpose behind hijab seems to be discouraging harassment or misconduct from men and encouraging modest interactions. 

When it comes to protecting girls from sexual harassment or indecent conduct from men, I certainly don't think that a girl has to be mature enough to understand things that her parents tell her to do. For instance, parents might tell a child not to wear certain things in public, not to go certain places alone, not to talk to certain people, not to get into a car with a stranger, not to talk to strangers online, etc. 

The parents say these things because the child isn't usually old enough to understand them.

Of course boys should be protected too, but usually there is an extra concern about girls. 

Obviously the hijab does not wholly prevent harassment or misconduct, and it is wrong to say that it does, but since discouraging harassment and encouraging modest interactions seems to be the underlying purpose behind it, this is the angle I am responding from.

There are other things surrounding the hijab such as presenting one's identity as a Muslim. Most children who are nine years old are able to understand that and verbalize it to others (e.g. "I wear hijab because I am Muslim") if they have been raised in a religious family or environment. 

Of course, I understand that hijab can be stressful in a minority situation and there may be things that the child is not yet ready to handle, such as Islamophobia or bullying. This might be a different situation. However, these are more situation-related, not related to the main idea of hijab. 

 

108064

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 2 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

The fiqhi ruling for this is the same for any wali amr, and she would need the consent of her father, whether he is Muslim or not. This is in the case that she has not been married before and is not completely independent in everything she does (balighah/rashidah). 

And Allah knows best. 

107000

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answer updated 2 years ago

The evidence of age of Bolugh (puberty) has come from the The Prophet Muhammad (Peace and Blessings Be Upon Him and His Holy Progeny) and after him from The Infallible Imams (AS). We have number of most authentic Hadeeths in this regard stating that the girl becomes Baligh when she completes nine Lunar years and the boy becomes Baligh by certain signs on his body and if no signs happen in his body than on completing 15 Lunar years. In Kitab Al-Kaafi Volume-7 Page-198 narration from Imam Mohammad Al-Baqir (A.S.) “The girl when she completes 9 year she does not remain orphan anymore and she can be married and she will be responsible of all the obligatories on her and rights for her. In Kitab Al-Kaafi also Volume-7 Page-197 narration from Hamraan who said that I asked Aba Jafar (A.S.) : When does the boy or the girl becomes responsible?  Imam replied that the girl (becomes responsible) when she completes nine years; she will not remain orphan anymore and she will be responsible for her and on her. 
We have also also many authentic narrations about the age when the marriage is permissible means the sexual relationship between the husband and wife is not permissible until and unless the female completes nine lunar years. In Al-Kaafi narrated by Al-Halabi from Imam Jafar as-Sadiq (A.S.). Also in Al-Kaafi narrated from Zurarah from Imam Abi-Jafar al-Baqir (A.S.). Also in Kitab al-Kaafi another narration from Safwan ibne Yahya in the same meaning that marriage is not permissible to allow sexual intercourse before she completes nine lunar years. The details of the evidence are with those who are experts and every method of Shariath has got lot of details, we cannot take the opinions of the people, but people should always follow the verdict of the Maraaji of Taqleed who usually spend their lives in studying and understanding Quran and Hadeeth and understanding the evidence and coming out with the Islamic rule or verdict according to their research and understanding.
Wassalam.

106111

Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 3 years ago

You should not invite them to your house as Islamic law strongly discourages or condemns the situation where a woman and a non-mahram male are alone together. (Whether you would be alone in the house or alone in a room.) There is no need for them to be at your house. This will prevent any sort of problems.

Also remember that your intentions are only your own, and you don't have any guarantee about what the other person is intending or experiencing. 

105742

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 3 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

In regards to marriage and having a befitting suitor proposing to you, this is something that will hopefully happen in the right time and by the right person. All you need to do is keep with your dua, positivity, patience and good principles and standards. 

We have so many ahadith that condemn people who go after looks in marriage, or wealth. You do not want a shallow person who's understanding of life is just outer appearance of people. If you have high akhlaq and you are a person of values and you are religious, then they are missing out, not you. 

As for your family members, I am sure they are not serious with these comments, and you should not take things to heart. Do not let sarcasm or negative comments affect you or get under your skin. Brush them off, and smile or laugh back. The less you react to their comments, the less they will say these kind of things that could hurt you. 

Try speaking to somebody you trust, who could also have a serious conversation with your family about these comments. 

In shaa Allah my fellow colleagues will also have some advice for you as well. 

With prayers for your success. 

105505

Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answer updated 3 years ago

The previous answer is complete; I just wanted to add that "not being mentally ready" could mean a number of different things.

My first impression when reading that was that it could mean she is not mentally ready to wear the hijab in a minority society (or a Muslim area where hijab is uncommon) - for instance, at a school where there are no other girls who wear hijab, and she might be under pressure to explain herself (but not be able to do so yet), or be teased, ostracized, or bullied, especially if she is shy or sensitive and does not have an assertive personality or a strong ability to stand up for herself. 

In some places, Islamophobic harassment might also be a concern. 

Not that it necessarily has anything to do with her personal sexuality.

I just wanted to add that because sometimes there is a tendency to discuss the hijab wholly in the context of sexuality or modesty, wheres in minority societies, the main challenges and pressures regarding hijab are usually social and relate to things like Islamophobia. 

In any case, it is good to acknowledge, respect, and nurture the inherent maturity of young people. Even if they are still maturing in many ways, throughout much of history, young people have taken on many lifelong commitments at a young age, such as apprenticing to a profession, training in sports or the arts, or a religious conversion. Of course it is also good to acknowledge the limits of a child's maturity, since one doesn't expect someone who is 9 to be mature in every way. Still, in this day and age, in some societies, everyone who is under 18 is treated as a child which does not benefit them either; it is good to have a balance. 

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 3 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Inner and outer modesty, chastity and hijab is something Almighty God has mandated for all men and women. 

It is necessary for us as Muslims to familiarise ourselves with the many benefits of inner and outer hijab, and the earlier we learn this the better. 

Young boys need to be modest, and so do young girls, even though they might not be intellectually mature enough. As long as they are aware of their surroundings, and have entered into the age of religious maturity, they become responsible and accountable for what they do. 

This is what bulugh and takleef means. 

Furthermore, being modest and having hijab does not necessarily mean one is sexually active. It is a process of engaging with the natural and mental development of a male/female. 

An Islamic lifestyle prepares us for the world, and whether this particular girl might be mentally ready or not, she must adapt to what it is that our religion wants from us, as the Almighty has accommodated to all that is required for us in our natural needs as humans. 

A young girl who reaches the age of taklif will realise how beneficial and positive hijab is when she prioritises her spiritual and moral conduct over everything else, and she will realise how intellectually mature she becomes. 

As for the age of bulugh, for a female it is completion of 9 lunar years. For a male, it is the occuring of one of the following, whichever one occurs first is the sign of his bulugh:

1. having a wet-dream.
2. growth of thick pubic hair. 
3. completing of 15 lunar years. 

And Allah knows best.

103489

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 3 years ago

Muslim man is not allowed to permanently marry a Non Muslim woman from people of Book. Temporary marriage is permissible under some conditions.

Nikah is the recitation of the marriage agreement whether permanent or temporary which is must.

Wassalam.

99823

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 3 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Yes, a paternal and maternal uncle / aunt is considered mahram. 

And Allah knows best.

95556

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 3 years ago

Bismihi ta'ala

There is no problem with tickling your sister, or playing games, as long as it is all halal. 

With prayers for your success.