The divorce would not be valid if that was the case, and the best thing to do is for you both to refer to a qualified scholar for marriage counselling, and if no solution can be made and there is no hope for reconciliation, then husband can inform the qualified scholar and conduct the divorce in the correct way, meeting all the valid requirements, and give a document for it as well.
There is no 'iddah for the wife to observe while "filing" for divorce. She must observe 'iddah only after the Islamic divorce is recited. When the talaq is recited, her 'iddah period will be three menstrual cycles.
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