I am sorry to hear about your difficulties (or the difficulties of the person you are asking on behalf of).
To add to the below response, I find that marriages tend to work out best when the husband and wife feel they can talk openly to each other about their lives without feeling they have to keep secrets. It can be difficult to build a deep relationship when there are big parts of one's life one feels that one can't discuss.
At the same time, real life being what it is, sometimes it doesn't work out to share some things and sometimes one person will use them against the other if they are not entirely of good character. I can also understand not wanting to open up about something personal or sensitive to the whole family and having them weigh in on it or talk about it with each other.
Anyway, there is no shame (or at least there should be no shame) in mental health conditions, just as, indeed, there is often no shame in the other things that people, often women, feel compelled to keep secret for social reasons.
I do agree however that when a person finds out something later, oftentimes the reaction is worse because they feel deceived and that it is a betrayal of trust.
But you have to make whatever decision is best - perhaps consider doing istikhara about sharing it, if you are genuinely unsure?
I will not lecture you about God's comparison and mercy, as you must be well aware of how the Almighty forgives all sins, and cleans our slates once we turn to Him with sincere repentance.
It is forgetting the past that you must be focusing on, and how you are able to develop a level of piety that you will enter into a new phase in your life, based on religious devotion and spiritual growth. That will not just ensure you've been forgiven, but also keep you on the straight path.
Your sin is between you and Allah ta'ala, and you must not reveal it to anybody. From a shar'i perspective, you do not need to tell your future spouse your previous sin.
Once you have changed your ways and sincerely forgiven, and became more religiously active and aware, then you live your life normally, and think positively for the future, not allowing the past to define who you are.
Thank you for your question. At the moment, Shii law does not consider mental health as an issue that would annul a marriage contract. However, considering the fact that marriage in the modern world is a major decision for both parties it would be wise to not hide such issues as they will inevitably come up during the course of a persons marriage at which stage your partner may feel hard done by. Especially if it is something you are not entirely over. With these situations it is helpful to put yourself in the other party's shoes and treat others as you would like to be treated yourself.
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