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Husband must maintain practical justice between his wives. Practical justice is in treating them and spending time with each of them equally like he spends time with his other wives. It also requires spending on each of them equally.
Wassalam.

Visiting your mother and being very nice to her and to your father is your responsibility as a good human being beside your Islamic duty as Muslim. You need also to give your wife her rights and never ignore your responsibility towards her. Keeping the balance is always required between different responsibilities. As far as you don't do injustice to your wife's rights, you must always look after your parents in every possible way and spend with whatever they need from you.

Wassalam.

Bismihi ta'ala

Islam encourages healthy sexual relations between husband and wife, and to cater for each other's sexual needs and lusts, as long as they are within the shar'i and moral boundaries. 

It is highly mustahab to address their sexual needs. For example, foreplay is highly recomended, where first it is recommended to engage in mudāʿabah, which means verbal foreplay, then mulāʿabah, physical foreplay, and then mujāmaʿah, which is having sex. 
Oral sex is a part of mulāʿabah, and there is no problem with that as well. In regards to semen, in Shi'i fiqh, it is considered najis, and therefore, should the husband ejaculate in wife's mouth, she must not swallow any of it, and must wash her mouth. 

Also, the wife does not need to perform ghusl in this instance.

Of course, there are certain sexual practices in today's Western society that are inhumane, immoral, degrading and humiliating, but happily accepted by some. As Muslims, we we must not imitate whatever is out there, or  what is in pornography, etc.

As much as our religion encourages intimacy and sex within marriage, we also have a duty to dignify our spouse and never make her feel uncomfortable.

And Allah knows best.

Bismihi ta'ala

It is wrong for your wife to pry into your past sins, and if it has nothing to do with your current life or has no involvement with your marriage, it is haram for you to disclose it to others. We are not allowed to expose our previous sins to others, or confess to anyone about the past, especially if we have repented. 

She should refrain from asking you about it, and you do not need to lie. You just refuse to give any information about it. 

With prayers for your success