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Zaid Alsalami,
Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from ANU, Canberra. He has written and translated several Islamic texts and also prepared educational videos on Islamic rulings and practices. 707 Answers
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Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi,
Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to religious questions. In the past, he has also spent significant time in India guiding the community. 3751 Answers
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Amina Inloes,
Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the Islamic College in London and also the Managing Editor of the Journal of Shi'a Islamic Studies. 651 Answers
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Bismihi ta'ala
This is a difficult, but unfortunately common situation. As young adults wish to commence their married life, their main focus is stability and building a relationship with their new partner.
Sadly, with some parents of different generations and incorrect mindsets, their focus is more on gaining social status, trying to please those around them, showing off wealth, etc.
Of course, at times parents might think that having a lavish wedding is their method of expressing their happiness and love, but indeed this is the wrong and un-Islamic way of doing so.
Alhamdullilah, the groom is conscious of these things, and his focus is on more important matters. The groom does not need to "donate" the money to the needy. Yes, giving sadaqah is good, but at the same time, this money that the parents want to use to spend of extravagent wedding can be used to invest in their future. For example, as a down-payment for their house, and so on.
I discuss these things in detail on a FB page I have. Please visit it:
https://www.facebook.com/Wedding-the-Halal-Way-1659428630969248/
With prayers for your success.