Daughter and sons are considered to be the fruits of the garden of human life, who do not have any alternative way of continuing their lives except in joint endeavour, planning and a shared life, since life in the shape of celibacy is a bitter and badly concluding one, striking the buds of life in the half way, throws them away.
The hand of the Creator has bestowed a kind of attraction and pull between these two forms of fruits, so that each one demands and desires the other's company after having reached a certain age.
Their anxiety, distress and boiling sentiments are comforted and soothed through marriage. The Qur’anic verse says:
وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُمْ مِنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُمْ مَوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً إِنَّ فِي ذَلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ
“And one of His signs is that he created mates for you from yourselves that you may find rest in them, and He put between you love and compassion; most surely there are signs in this for a people who reflect.”(30:21)
This saying described the secret of creation as clear evidence on this point.
The co-working and co-existence of two people can only be fruitful, beneficial and persistent when their spirits, instincts, and way of thinking are in ne direction. Otherwise, the rope or unity and communion becomes weak and soft and finally breaks, shattering the framework of co-existence.
In our lives, we observe the emergence of bitter and painful situations, which not only torment and agonize the husband and wife, but also their families. As such, after a short span of time, the palace of life is dismantled and the sweet tree of marital relations bears bitter fruit when the couple approaches the court and is separated. Perhaps they may be able to choose a suitable partner for themselves again but too many times, the wronged and oppressed children are forgotten when the parents walk away.
One factor is most effective in elaborating and explaining the reason for this situation, (of course, it cannot be said that this factor is the only one), but this factor is to start out with wrong calculations and estimations, (those very wrong, weighted and unconsidered ideas from the foundation of life), instead of a correct and exact study and estimation is the selection of a life partner. If correct principles were observed in the process of spouse selection, the major portion of separation, divorces and partings would not have dried up and withered from the tree of life.
In this book, which is now being presented to the respected reader, this very factor has been pointed out when it teaches the correct way to select a spouse.
I studied a part of this book and found it very useful and beneficial for the young generation, particularly now that the book contains a series of experience providing narratives, which can make the theories and inferences definite and positive.
Having congratulated the honourable writer and distinguished scholar about this precious and valuable book, I request the respectable publisher chalk out a plan regarding the publishing and distribution of the book, so that it reaches the hands of our youth, thereby taking a big and important step to solving our problems and as a consequence, reducing the number of divorces. The saying of the prophet (S) is:
ما بني بناء في الإسلام أحب إلي الله من التزويج.
This saying may become more materialised and shaped into practice.
Institution of Imam As-Sadiq (a.s)
Ayatollah Ja’far Subhani
1995, 1st of Moharram, 1415, Hijrah
- 1. Wasail, vol 14, p3.