Marriage

Marriage, also called matrimony or wedlock, is a culturally and often legally recognised union between people called spouses. It establishes rights and obligations between them, as well as between them and their children (if any), and between them and their in-laws. It is nearly a cultural universal, but the definition of marriage varies between cultures and religions, and over time.

150930

Istikhara . Marriage

I performed Istikhara for marriage, but the outcome was negative. Is it possible to reverse this for a positive result? Should I consider leaving the man, or is there still hope? What steps can I take for a positive outcome?

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 1 year ago

It is advisable to act upon the Istekhara provided that the Istekhara was valid with all it's conditions. We can never control the result of any Istekhara and we need to submit to it and be sure that it is for our interest. If the Istekhara is negative, you can wait till the circumstances of the subject change then you can see another Istekhara.

Wassalam.

189784

Husband . Marriage . Polygamy . Divorce

My husband asserts his exclusive love for me but wishes to marry another woman without justification. I disagree with this marriage; does my consent matter? Given my inability to handle the stress of a second marriage, am I allowed to ask for a divorce?

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 1 year ago

Bismihi ta'ala

Your husband should concentrate his focus on you, and not aim at pursuing his lust. He should focus on building a family with you, and living a prosperous and productive life. You have a right to object, and you also have a right to ask for divorce. That will be your choice and your choice only.

And Allah knows best

190206

Marriage . Islam . Faith (Iman)

I have a dilemma regarding marriage. I desire to get married, but I am concerned it may distract me from my devotion to Allah. Given that marriage is encouraged in Islam, how can it be approached to strengthen faith instead of weakening it?

Bismihi ta'ala

In no way does marriage weaken faith. Rather the exact opposite. Marriage is half of religion, and the Prophetic (s.a.w.) hadith says.

It's just a matter of managing your life, your time, your self-discipline and your spiritual growth.

And Allah knows best

183922

Sexual . Husband . Masturbation . Marriage

A married couple is in a long-distance relationship for 2 years and use video calls to address their sexual desires. But the husband asks the wife to stimulate herself to arouse him. Does this act count as masturbation?

Masturbation is not permissible. Wife is not allowed to arouse herself by her own hands or body. Her husband is allowed to do that for her physically when he is with her and not from long distance.

Wassalam.

190211

Marriage . Divorce . Children . Mother . Brother . Time . Domestic violence . Guilt . Hell

After enduring 20 years in an abusive marriage, that ended in divorce, and raising my children alone, why do I still feel guilty and fear hell, especially when my mother and brother don't accept me and consistently make me feel bad whenever we interact?

Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answer updated 1 year ago

I am sorry to hear about your situation.

This is probably due to the psychology of being in an abusive marriage; possibly the abuser always said directly or indirectly that whatever happens is your fault. (Unfortunately, other people in society will also blame the woman, even if the husband is responsible for his choices.)

Also, in life, we internalize an internal judgmental voice (like a "parent") which judges us based on the social norms that we absorb from other people. This inner voice will continue to judge us even if those people are no longer around (and, in this case, it sounds like there are people who may still be actively reinforcing these ideas).

Many Muslim women, especially in our generation and above, internalized a voice that said that being a good Muslim woman means being married and having children, and a woman who gets divorced is bad. This idea is more about social expectations (or wanting the security of a marriage for a daughter) rather than Allah or faith.

However, it is common for Muslim women who grew up around these ideas to deal with guilt after divorce, and it can take time to revise one's ideas about what is genuinely important before Allah and in the next life and offload social expectations that no longer serve us.

Sometimes this is also a way of processing trauma as well.

In all these cases, probably the best way to handle it is through qualified psychological counselling/therapy as well as reflection on what is really important in matters of faith. Sometimes, just identifying the issue is a step forward.

Wishing you the best!

189741

Wife . Marriage . Polygamy

Is it a requirement in Islam for the first wife to give consent for the husband to marry a second wife?

Sayyed Muhammad Husaini Ragheb, Sayyed Muhammad Husaini Ragheb has a BA in Law from Guilan University, Iran and has also undertaken Hawzah studies in Qom. He used to be a Cultural Affairs director of Ethics Group of Al-Mustafa... Answer updated 1 year ago

If by giving consent, her sister is saved from sin and poverty and staying single and not becoming a mother, then what a Mustahab act can you find better than sharing your husband with her?
have a look a these narrations:
بإسناده عن عليّ عليه السلام قال قال رسول اللّه صلّى اللّه عليه و آله كتب اللّه الجهاد على رجال أُمّتى، والغيرة
على نساء أُمّتى، فمن صبرت منهنّ واحتسبت أعطاها اللّه أجر شهيد

"On the authority of Ali (peace be upon him), he said that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family) said: Allah has prescribed jihad for the men of my nation, and Ghayrat(jealousy about having a co-wife) for the women of my nation. So whoever among them is patient and endures with the intention of seeking reward, Allah will grant her the reward of a martyr.
العدة ، عن البرقي ، عن محمد بن الحسن ، عن يوسف بن حماد ، عمن ذكره ، عن جابر قال: قال أبو جعفر عليه السّلام : "غيرة النساء الحسد و الحسد هو أصل الكفر إن النساء إذا غرن غضبن و إذا غضبن كفرن إلا المسلمات منهن".
The jealousy of women is envy, and envy is the root of disbelief. When women become jealous, they become angry, and when they become angry, they disbelieve, except for the believing women among them."

Of course everyone should know that it's not obligatory for you to give consent and it's better that men understand their wives' emotions and as long as the first wife has not fully given her consent they don't go for the second. because they should not ruin the first life for helping another sister.
All said above are recommendations and not obligations
Wassalam

112785

Meaning . Marriage . Coercion

What constitutes a simple scenario of coercion in marriage? Can emotional pressure lead someone to agree unwillingly? Some elders argue that emotional manipulation differs from actual coercion. Is this viewpoint accurate?

If marriage was recited by force or coercion, such marriage is invalid in Islam.

Wassalam.

188105

Zina . Divorce . Kaffara . Marriage . Woman

If a married woman commits Zina and sincerely repents, can she marry that man after a divorce or widowhood? Are there any atonement options or other measures she should consider?

Bismihi ta'ala

No, she cannot marry that man at all, and under any circumstance.

Of course, there is a slight difference of opinion among our esteemed jurists, so it is best for her to also confirm the fatwa of her Marja' taqleed.

And Allah knows best

187231

Brother . Daughter . Marriage . Grandparents

Can a boy marry his grandfather's brother's daughter according to Islamic law?

Salam
Yes

187507

Iddah . Woman . Khula . Marriage

Is it necessary for a woman to observe iddah after obtaining Khula'a if there was no intercourse during the three years of marriage?

If the marriage was never consummated and no sexual inter course happened at all, then no Iddah will be required after the divorce or Khul’a. If marriage was consummated and sexual intercourse took place between husband and his wife even one time, then Iddah will be compulsory even if they did not have intercourse for years before divorce.

Wassalam.