Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the Islamic College in London and also the Managing Editor of the Journal of Shi'a Islamic Studies.
Maybe it is good to talk to someone wise and trustworthy since the believers are encouraged to take advice from each other, so that this can help you make the best decision and figure out why your heart and mind are having different opinions.
If it is possible to explore or further investigate the option you are thinking about, without committing anything haraam or causing any harm to yourself or others, perhaps that might also shed some light on it.
For some things in life of course we don't know about them until we do them.
It is ok to recite that way. After all, there have been many Muslims who can't read at all and still recite from memory.
Still there is a certain blessing that the actual Arabic script of the Qur'an is said to hold and it is narrated that looking at the Qur'an is a type of worship; my understanding is that this involves the actual Arabic letters. So it is good to learn to read the Arabic script if you can. There are a lot of self-study materials available today.
But if you can't, that is also ok too.
There is no theological reason why it is impossible to see Shaytan, although most people do not see Shaytan on a regular basis.
However, how does your friend know it is Shaytan, specifically? Is he arriving with an ID card? What about just garden-variety shayateen?
Basically there is no way to prove things which are not objectively measurable. That is, there is no way to prove he is seeing Shaytan and there is no way to prove that he is not. All you can say is that he sees something, and this is what he understands it to be.
It is said that doing wrong acts leaves an ugly imprint on the soul which becomes manifest in the hereafter. For this reason, some mystics are said to be able to see people's true natures. So perhaps this might also be what he is seeing.
I might be suspicious of the clause "whenever someone does something wrong according to Islam", because sometimes people do things that are ethically wrong but are not obviously forbidden. For instance, it is allowed to buy a knife. However, if I buy a knife to murder someone, this is very wrong. Still, it would not be obvious from my purchase that I am committing a sin.
Similarly, we do not always know when someone is doing something wrong. For instance, someone might be lying or trying to flatter someone in order to take advantage of them, but we do not always know it. Along the same lines, we don't usually know if someone is secretly breaking their fast or committing other hidden sins.
(Of course if he is seeing Shaytan in these cases, it is a different story.)
Anyway, most people do not require Shaytan to do wrong things as we are quite capable of doing them ourselves without him.
It starts on the previous day at sunset. Example:
| Saturday, February 13 = 1 Rajab |
1 Rajab starts on Friday at sunset and ends on Saturday at sunset.
Hope that helps!
I am sorry to hear about your situation. It is normal to re-evaluate how a marriage is going after 7 or 8 years and see if it is functioning well.
Life is (somewhat) about choices. If the marriage isn't working for you, Islamically speaking, the first step is to try to make it work (for instance, as mentioned, through communication or a marriage counselor, if he is willing). That said, it requires the interest and commitment of both people in a marriage for things to change.
If he isn't interested in changing, then you need to decide what you want for your own life and future, and whether to accept the situation as it is or to try to move on (obviously, taking into account all factors, such as how the relationship is otherwise, financial matters, whether you have children and what you feel would be best for them, etc). While divorce is discouraged in Islam, and, statistically speaking, women tend to suffer more than men (financially and emotionally) after divorce, it is also not good to harm yourself or stunt your growth and potential if there is no greater good behind it.
This is ultimately a decision that you would have to make for yourself since no one is in your shoes and can fully understand your situation, especially if depression is a factor.
I would suggest in any case - and I hope I am not overstepping my boundaries - that regardless of whether or not separation might be in the future, it is always healthy to have friends and associates who can be a safety net in a time of crisis. This is true both for yourself as an individual, but also for the family, as we never know what will happen - what if he were to suddenly be in a coma or something? If there is any way to make friendships, even online, it would be helpful not only psychologically but also on a practical level.
(Indeed, in the current world situation, many of us are discovering the value of having a safety net.)
I would also point out as tactfully as possible that, oftentimes, when someone is extremely suspicious and untrusting, it is because they have things to hide, or else they have behaved questionably in the past. Otherwise, normal people are not usually extremely suspicious or untrusting. I am just putting that out there, and that may not at all be the case in your situation. It is just an observation about human psychology.
Life sometimes doesn't have easy answers but prayer for guidance is also always a good start.
People have a right to privacy, and he has a right to privacy just as you have a right to privacy. There could be any number of reasons, other than cheating, why he wishes to keep his phone private. Sometimes pushing people in these things can lead to greater conflict.
Also, when people communicate via WhatsApp, etc, there is generally an assumption that the conversation is private. (Whether or not it involves cheating) For a third party to read it is also a violation of the other person's privacy, especially if they are talking about sensitive things like personal problems, work problems, legal problems, etc. So it is really not appropriate to read someone else's private conversations. Certainly if I talk to someone on one of these platforms, I don't expect their spouse to be reading it (regardless of their gender).
Similarly, spying is not appropriate. Just as we wouldn't like to be spied on, we should not spy on others.
Might I suggest that if you are having the idea that he is cheating or contemplating divorce, it isn't really about the phone itself, but maybe there are other things that are bringing these thoughts to mind. So maybe it is good to address the current issues between you two (rather than focusing on what if questions). If he seems distant or something else, maybe there is something in the relationship between the two of you that could be addressed, if possible.
It is ok to address a secondary cause (whether it be Imam 'Ali, an employer, a relative, etc) to request specific assistance as long as one agrees that Allah is the primary cause and these are just secondary means.
There is theoretically no problem with addressing the angels as well. However the Qur'an says that the angels fulfil God's command as God gives it to them and therefore this suggests they do not usually act according to the wishes or preferences of human beings. For instance, if an angel assigned to deliver sustenance, it will deliver what it was told to and not what the person wants. So for instance if I just casually say "Ya Jibra'il", it might not have the same effect. Of course God knows best.
There are some narrations indicating that the believer (mu'min) and/or those who have allegiance (wilayah) to Ahl al-Bayt (A) are created from a specific sort of clay, which is sometimes associated with the Euphrates. The faithless (kafir) and/or enemies of Ahl al-Bayt (A) are created from another sort of clay. And most people are of a sort of mix between the two which is why we have diverse temperaments.
Anyway, if these narrations are correctly transmitted, they seem to be more metaphorical about our natures and not literally relating to what kind of components we are physically constructed from. In fact, given that we human beings primarily gain our physical material from eating, and food is imported and shipped worldwide today, we are often built from the "clay" of many different regions!
So with that in mind, it is reasonable to say that someone with a strong affinity for Ahl al-Bayt (A) might have some creational link to Karbala metaphorically or metaphysically.
That being said, I am not aware of any text that indicates that we are buried in the same place whose clay we are created from, or which really assigns any significance to the region where we are physically buried.
In fact that Qur'an tells us that we don't know what land we will be buried in; life is full of surprises and we never know where we will go, nor when we will go.
Similarly the Qur'an does not assign any particular ethical significance to where we live and just says that Allah's earth is vast and if we are unable to live freely in one area, we should move.
I am sorry to hear about your difficulties (or the difficulties of the person you are asking on behalf of).
To add to the below response, I find that marriages tend to work out best when the husband and wife feel they can talk openly to each other about their lives without feeling they have to keep secrets. It can be difficult to build a deep relationship when there are big parts of one's life one feels that one can't discuss.
At the same time, real life being what it is, sometimes it doesn't work out to share some things and sometimes one person will use them against the other if they are not entirely of good character. I can also understand not wanting to open up about something personal or sensitive to the whole family and having them weigh in on it or talk about it with each other.
Anyway, there is no shame (or at least there should be no shame) in mental health conditions, just as, indeed, there is often no shame in the other things that people, often women, feel compelled to keep secret for social reasons.
I do agree however that when a person finds out something later, oftentimes the reaction is worse because they feel deceived and that it is a betrayal of trust.
But you have to make whatever decision is best - perhaps consider doing istikhara about sharing it, if you are genuinely unsure?
This possibility exists for almost any book that has come to us from the time before mass printing. In the days when manuscripts were hand copied, there was a lot of room for error, although there were various safeguards that classical Islamic scholars used to try to reduce the possibility of intentional or unintentional error.
Regarding Kitab Sulaym, it is possible that some of it is correctly ascribed to the transmitter who called himself Sulaym ibn Qays and some comes from other people. (This is also true for any other work.) However, in any case, the content of Kitab Sulaym seems to be mostly traceable to an early era of Islam so it most likely reflects what was going on in that time regardless of exactly where every bit came from.
However, proving tampering also requires some proof or at least proof of motivation, and I don't think we have any evidence to suggest that specifically Aban ibn Abi Ayyash tampered with it. If there are interpolations, they probably came in later copies.
The only real exception to this rule is the Qur'an, because it was transmitted and memorized by so many people, that it would have been very hard to add things to it without causing mass objections.
It is really difficult for us human beings to know what aspects of fate are unchangeable and which are changeable as this knowledge belongs to Allah. However, hadith say that some unwanted things which are fated can be changed by prayer (du'a) or good acts (such as charity). God knows best.
Here are some thoughts on that: https://www.al-islam.org/ask/can-dua-change-your-taqdeer-and-fate