Parents

A parent is a caregiver of the offspring in their own species. In humans, a parent is the caretaker of a child (where "child" refers to offspring, not necessarily age). A biological parent is a person whose gamete resulted in a child, a male through the sperm, and a female through the ovum.

67549

Parents . Inheritance . Marriage

Can parents abandon a son for marrying a cousin against their wishes? Do they have the right to deprive him of all inheritance?

Sayyed Muhammad Husaini Ragheb, Sayyed Muhammad Husaini Ragheb has a BA in Law from Guilan University, Iran and has also undertaken Hawzah studies in Qom. He is a Cultural Affairs director of Ethics Group of Al-Mustafa Open... Answered 3 weeks ago

According to Fiqh i.e. jurisprudence, a boy has no need to acquire the consent of either of parents, so he can marry any girl even if it is against his parents' consent.
Please bear in mind that I'm not answering according to moral and sociological advice!
As for the second part of your question, we have nothing like that in Islam and as soon as a person dies his/her connection to their possessions is removed and the properties automatically go into the account of the heirs, so if one is going to deprive an heir of getting their properties, they must transfer whatever they have in their lifetime to other people.

Parents . Inheritance . Marriage

Can parents abandon a son for marrying a cousin against their wishes? Do they have the right to deprive him of all inheritance?

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 3 weeks ago

The son should keep the respect of his parents in every matter but it is not obligatory on him to get their approval for his marriage. Father's approval is required in the virgin marriage.

Parents are not allowed to abandon their son just because he did not marry according to their wish. Abandoning any relative is a major sin in Islam.

No one is allowed to deprive his son or daughter from inheritance as far as they are Muslims.

Wassalam.

66454

Parents . Children . Soul

What is the relationship between the name parents give their children and their soul? Can the child later choose to change their name to one that they prefer even though there was nothing inherently wrong with their birth name?

Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 1 month ago

A person is allowed to change their name even if there is nothing inherently wrong with their birth name.

Whether there is a relationship between one's birth name and one's soul is a more difficult question. I am not aware of anything in our religious sources that discusses this apart from that on the Day of Judgment it is said that people will be addressed by their names and their mothers' names (apart from Shi'i texts which say that the Prophet's descendants will be addressed by their names and fathers' names), but it is hard to say without being there whether that will be a recognizably verbal utterance of a name or just some means of identifying us that we will understand. Also, there are situations where the Imams (A) informed people of their birth names (as part of demonstrating their comprehensive knowledge) and perhaps there is a hint of some significance there. But in those cases it seems that the birth names were changed due to circumstances and not because the person actually wanted to be identified by a different name.

So, I think the best answer to the first question is that maybe there is a relationship, but if there is, it isn't something that is focused on in the Twelver Shi'i tradition.

Certainly the Prophet (S) did not see a problem in encouraging people to change their names where necessary.

As a side note, although I've never seen this discussed, I would imagine that some of the mothers of the Imams (A) were not born with the names they were born with because their names are usually given as Arabic/Persianate whereas some of them were said to come from far-off regions, so perhaps some of them acquired these names during their life journey.

65254

Parents . Daughter . Son

There are religious sayings that suggest that having daughters is a blessing. Are there similar sayings for parents who only have sons?

Yes, there are many narrations in books of Hadeeth mentioning the reward for parents who have daughters and bring them up properly, that they will be in the Paradise.

Narrated from Imam Jafar Al-Sadiq (AS) : Daughters are reward while sons are a bounty, and reward will be for those who have daughters, while bounties will be asked about. (Al-Kaafi 6:6).

The believer is happy with what ever Allah (SWT) grants him, because Allah (SWT) knows the best for us, now and every time. Allah (SWT) grants to a couple only daughters or only sons or both, and does not give some couples any children, all because of His Wisdom and Mercy on us. (Sura 42, Verses 49 and 50).

Accepting and being satisfied with the will of Allah (SWT) is very important for he believers.

Wassalam.

65300

Parents . Marriage . Employment

What should a guy do if he wants to get married but he doesn't have a stable job and his parents are against him?

Seyed Ali Shobayri, Seyed Ali Shobayri is of mixed Iranian and Scottish descent who found the path of the Ahlul Bayt (a) by his own research. He holds a BA in Islamic Studies from Middlesex University through the... Answered 1 month ago

Bismillah,

Asalamu alaykom,

Firstly one should know that Allah The Exalted has promised sustenance for those who marry:

"If they be poor, Allah will enrich them of His bounty. Allah is of ample means, Aware." Quran - 24:32

This doesn't however mean that one shouldn't make an effort to seek a halal income for themselves. Realistically in a capitalistic society, one should seek an income in order for them to maintain themselves and their family. Having an income is a means to achieve marriage but it doesn't mean that these things won't come after marriage. There are many who I know that were students with nothing yet, rizq came to them from places they could never imagine after marriage.

Alternatively one can get to know a future spouse in a halal way or even have a halal engagement (doing a type of marriage contract to make each other mahram) before moving in with each other. This way, one can prepare the necessary things before living together and prepare for marriage.

Having someone is also better for one's mental state because even if one didn't live with their spouse straight away, just knowing they have someone will make them less likely to sin as compared to someone who is single and worried about how to find a spouse.

Regarding parents, one may respectfully acknowledge their advice but it isn't obligatory to follow this advice if it wouldn't be in the best benefit of a believer. A person knows whether marriage would be obligatory upon them and whether it would help their spiritual and physiological state. Parents cannot always determine this.

May Allah give you success

65275

Girl . Parents . Sin . Marriage

Is it sinful for a girl to marry without the permission of her parents?

Bismillah, Asalamu Alaykom,

The primary or default ruling is that a virgin girl wanting to marry, MUST seek permission of her current guardian such as her father or her parental grandfather. Marrying without their permission wouldn’t be permissible. If neither were present however - which meant that it wasn’t possible for a girl to obtain their permission - then their permission wouldn’t be required. It could also be possible that both of them are deceased which would make the matter in the girl’s hands.

An important question arises though, and I believe that this matter must be addressed as I haven’t seen many scholars speak on it. The matter is as follows:

If you are enquiring about a secondary ruling on this matter, and are wanting to know if it’s possible in any circumstances for a girl to marry without the consent of her guardian, then the answer is yes.

The religion of Islam gives women rights and in extreme circumstances of hardship, the guardianship of the father can be dropped. Let us say that a family is oppressing their daughter by stopping her to marry for no legitimate Islamic reasons. Let us say that by preventing this girl to marry, she will fall into sin and start losing her religion; in such cases, a virgin girl may marry a suitable believer without permission provided that such a decision isn’t based on emotions or a haram so called ‘love marriage’. She should also be of sound mind and distinction.

We have faced many cases in our communities where due to racism or cultural reasons, parents have rejected suitable believing brothers to marry their daughters! Or even the other case where a son is stopped marrying a suitable believing woman due to non-Islamic reasons and family pressure. I have personally met brothers in their mid-thirties still unmarried due to past believing sisters never being able to satisfy their families’ cultural expectations. Such practices contradict the many ahadith from our Prophet and imams (peace be upon them) and people should reflect on the following narration:

فَإِنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ص قَالَ إِذَا جَاءَكُمْ مَنْ تَرْضَوْنَ خُلُقَهُ وَ دِينَهُ فَزَوِّجُوهُ إِنَّكُمْ إِلَّا تَفْعَلُوا ذَلِكَ تَكُنْ فِتْنَةٌ فِي الْأَرْضِ وَ فَسَادٌ كَبِيرٌ ‘

Verily the Messenger of Allāh (صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم) said: “If someone comes to you and you are satisfied with his manners and religion, marry him. Verily, if you do not do that, there will be fitnah (sedition) on the earth and great fasād (corruption)”

This is why we see many fall into corruption or even leave the religion due to not being married. Therefore, this is why some scholars have conducted marriage contracts without consent of the guardian as the refusal cannot be based on non-Islamic reasons.

Please check the rulings of some Maraja below:

2440. If a guardian’s refusal to allow a virgin to marry will cause her serious harm, or contribute to social corruption, or cause her unbearable hardship, then his guardianship is nullified and she can marry immediately without his permission. But if she is not intellectually mature, then she becomes a ward of the religious authority (the marjaʿ).

- S. Taqi Al-Moddaressi, The Laws of Islam, p.439.

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"Q: If a baligh and mature girl wishes to marry a devout Muslim young man but her father refuses this for material reasons, is it permissible for her to marry him without the consent of the father, if the latter continues to insist on his refusal?"

A: It is permissible, if the husband is of equal or comparable status to her.

S. Sadiq Al-Shirazi, Islamic Laws, p.486

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2441. If a girl is not a virgin, or if she is a virgin but seeking the consent of her father or paternal grandfather is not possible, or entails a lot of hardship and she needs to get married, then the consent of her father or paternal grandfather will not be mandatory.

- Wahid Khorasani, Islamic laws, p.518.

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Q [45]

If the guardian of a virgin girl refuses to grant her permission to get married, is the girl allowed to get married?

A - if the guardian refuses to give his permission for her marriage for the sake of her own welfare then she is not permitted to marry without the consent. If the person that approached her for marriage was suitable for her and the refusal of the guardian was out of stubbornness, then his permission is not required." - From the official website of Sayed Sa’eed Al-Hakeem.

So to answer the question, if a girl married without permission for no valid Islamic reason, then it would be sinful. If she however had no choice due to extreme circumstances and was forced to flee her home, then no sin has been committed inshallah.

Please note that the above rulings should be taken into consideration as a very LAST resort. Even if a sister’s parents reject a suitable believer, she should do everything possible to try and convince them. She may also seek help from reputable scholars or members of her Muslim community to mediate between her and her parents.

May Allah grant you success

64804

Parents . Silat al-Rahm

What is one's Islamic responsibility if their parents order them to ignore a relative and not to converse with them even if that aunt or uncle still want to keep in touch?

You must (as a compulsory duty) keep in touch with all your relatives even if your parents do not like some of them. Cutting ties with any of your relatives is a major sin. Your parents are not allowed to cause or order any sinful act because the obedience of Allah (SWT) is more important than obeying your parents.

You should not do any thing which degrades your parents like criticizing or blaming them.

You can keep in touch with such relatives who are disliked by your parents, without announcing, to avoid hurting the feelings of your parents.

Wassalam.

63785

Grandparents . Parents . Marriage

What should be done if your grandparents are unhappy for you to marry someone but your parents have no issue about marrying the woman?

You need to keep the respect of your grand parents in every possible way, provided that your marriage choice is according to Islamic teachings. The objection of your grand parents does not invalidate the marriage if there is no valid reason for their objection.

Wassalam.

62290

Girl . Hijab . Parents

What should a girl do when she is willing to wear the Hijab but her parents say that she can't wear one or she can have the option of wearing one after she gets married?

Abbas Di Palma, Shaykh Abbas Di Palma holds a BA and an MA degree in Islamic Studies, and certifications from the Language Institute of Damascus University. He has also studied traditional Islamic sciences in... Answer updated 3 months ago

as salam alaikum

you should always respect your parents and treat them kindly. However they cannot dictate the way you have to live your religion. A hadith says:

لا طاعة لمخلوق في معصية الخالق

"There is no way to obey a creature by disobeying the Creator" (see "Musnad al-Imam al-Kazim").

You should also try to guide them with good manners and give them nasihah concerning their religious duty as Muslims and parents.

With prayers for your success.

62048

Parents . Marriage

Can I marry at the age of 18 if my parents are not happy about it?

Yes you can marry when ever you need to marry to save yourself from falling in sinful acts. In fact, it is the responsibility of the father to arrange the marriage of his son when he needs marriage. Parents are not allowed to object or delay the marriage if it is for save guarding the son or the daughter from sinful acts.

Man does not need permission from his parents in marriage, but virgin daughter needs permission of her father or paternal grand father in her marriage. Yet, if the father refuses the marriage of his daughter for no valid reason, when she needs marriage to protect herself from sinful acts, she will be then allowed to marry with the suitable believer.

Wassalam.

60848

Forgiveness . Parents . Soul

In addition to praying and asking for forgiveness for my deceased parents, what other good deeds can I regularly do on their behalf to please their soul and uplift their rank?

These are some useful acts for your deceased parents:

1. Fulfilling all their debts whether religious debts of worships which they missed (Prayers, Fast, Khums, Hajj etc) or financial or moral debts to people.

2. Paying Sadaqa or charity on their behalf. Charities with continuous benefits (Sadaqa Jaria) is much better like water will, Masjid, Husainia, orphanage, school, etc).

3. Arranging Majaalis on their behalf.

4. Reciting Quran or paying to people who can recite on their behalf.

5. Reciting Ziyarat Ashura and other Ziyarat on their behalf.

Wassalam.

59613

Kaffara . Parents

What is the Kaffara for misbehaving with parents and breaking their heart?

Misbehaving with parents is one of the most dangerous major sins. Major sins leads to hellfire unless you leave it and decide not to do it again and compensate it.

There is no specific Kaffara for such major sin, but to make yur parents happy with you by doing good to them till they pardon you and be happy with you from their heart not just by tongue.

Such major sin is very dangerous in this life as wel as hereafter, so, you need to do everything possible to make your parents happy enough to forgive you and pray fro your forgiveness.

No way to avoid the wrath and curse but to gain the happiness of your parents with you.

Wassalam.