Biologically, a child (plural: children) is a human being between the stages of birth and puberty, or between the developmental period of infancy and puberty. The legal definition of child generally refers to a minor, otherwise known as a person younger than the age of majority.
Regardless of whether it is permissible or not, supposing one of them was caught? What reputation would that give to the Shi'a living in that country? Why do they want the benefits of living in that country while at the same time not respecting it?
Yes, such a marriage can be accepted and one's past cannot be judged if they have done tawbah
May Allah grant you success
You should always fulfill your responsibility to protect your kids from harmful things, and nothing more harmful and damaging than sinful acts. If your husband allows your kids sinful acts, that does mean that you have no responsibility to protect them. You must talk to him in a suitable way to prove to him that both of you are responsible to protect your kids. You also need to explain to your kids the as much they can understand the concept of good and bad. Your husband will not permit your kids to eat a sweet which contaminated with microbes because it is harmful for their health, so, how can he permit sinful acts which are more harmful?
Do whatever you can (with wisdom) to protect yourself and your family from Hellfire, as Allah said: O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is men and stones. Sura 66, Verse 6.
Imam Hussain (AS) wanted sincere eye witnesses to tell people after his martyrdom what really happened in Karbala keeping in mind the falsehood which Yazeed and his gang were intending to spread among Muslims against Imam Hussain (AS). Mo'awiyah, father of Yazeed, spread rumors among people in Syria that Ali does not pray Namaz, that is why when the news reached Shaam that Imam Ali (AS) was martyred inside the Masjid of Kufa, people of Shaam started asking: What Ali was doing in the Masjid when he does not pray Namaz?
Yazeed and his gang wanted to fabricate stories against Imam Hussain (AS) to mislead people away from Ahlul Bayt (AS). Imam Hussain (AS) took his family members with him knowing what will happen to him and them, to make them witness and convey the message to all Muslims after him.
The great rule of Lady Zainab and Lady Um Kolthoum after Karbala shows how it was necessary to have eye witnesses to inform Muslim generations and refute the false propaganda of Yazeed.
The sufferings of the family of Imam Hussain (AS) was mentioned by him as narrated when he replied those who asked him why to take his family members: Allah has ordained to see me martyred and see my family members captured شاء الله أن يراني قتيلا ويراهنّ سبايا
This is going on in thousands of families but you as a believing and God fearing person should deal with it carefully and humbly.
You must tolerate your mother in every possible way. She is after all your mother and her right in you is greater than explaining. Even if the parents were non believers,b their rights as parents remains great in their children. Try your best to avoid instigating her by any word or act, and always tolerate her behavior and comments. It might be a test for you from Allah to examine your faith in Allah. Never react badly to any of her behavior and comments. Annoying your mother or father causes anger of Allah on you, God forbid.
For urine, you will need to wash it twice. I have a practical tutorial on this, which in shaa Allah will be of benefit:
1. When you know that Allah does not allow any marriage between a Muslim female and a non Muslim man and you write that "you feel that you went against Allah", you must repent and seek forgiveness and come back to Allah and never insist on doing wrong.
2. If you can convince the man and explain to him how to become a Muslim, then you need to recite a marriage agreement (Nikah) between you and him after becoming a Muslim in his heart.
3. If he refuses to become a Muslim, then there is no way that you can remain with him.
4. You must save yourself and your future from sinful acts.
According to Amaali al-Shaikh al-Sadouq, Janab e Muslim ibn Aqeel (AS) had two sons martyred in the day of Ashura with Imam Husain (AS) and another two sons who ran away from Karbala after the martyrdom of imam Husain (AS). These two sons where martyred later on after Karbala and were buried near Musayyab in Iraq. أمالي الشيخ الصدوق
Raising a child in need who is not your child is a great act of reward and it is a way to Paradise if it is done according to the teachings of Islam. As the child is not your child, there is no inheritance between you and the child, although you are free to give him in your will up to one third of what you leave, and you can gift him during your life whatever you like to gift him.
When the child becomes Baaligh, Hijab is must.
Who said that there won't be any children in Paradise? Allah (SWT) will reunite the believers with their children in the Paradise (Sura 13, Verse 23 and Sura 40, Verse 8). In the Hadeeth that all children of the believers who die during childhood will be looked after by Sara wife of Ebraheem and will be offered to enter Paradise, they will say: No till our parents enter Paradise. This means that the children of the believers will enter Paradise with their parents.
Parents are responsible to look after their children and protect them from harmful or dangerous websites and bad company. They must do whatever they can to protect their children and never leave them exposed to any harm or danger. That does not mean to insult or degrade their children but just to look after them and protect them. If they come to know about any mistake from any of their children, they must keep his respect and avoid insulting him.