Anger

The emotion, Anger, also known as wrath, is an intense emotional state. It involves a strong uncomfortable and hostile response to a perceived provocation, hurt or threat.A person experiencing anger will often experience physical conditions, such as increased heart rate, elevated blood pressure, and increased levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline. Some view anger as an emotion which triggers part of the fight or flight brain response.

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Mother . Anger . Forgiveness

What can I do to prevent Allah (SWT) from punishing me for my mother's anger when I remain silent instead of responding to her shaming and ridiculing behavior, which leads her to hold a grudge for days and makes it difficult for me to apologize to her?

Sayyed Mohammad Al-Musawi, Sayyed Mohammad al-Musawi is originally from Iraq and heads up the World Ahlul Bayt Islamic League in London. Other than being involved in various humanitarian projects, he frequently responds to... Answered 2 weeks ago

First of all, you should never think that you should deal with your mother or father like dealing with others. Parents are above all others and you should always deal with them as your masters after Allah and Ahlul Bayt, and never think them equal to you or similar.. When your parent get angry at you, you must apologize immediately in the way which makes them pleased with you. Never think apologizing to your parents an insult but it is in fact an honor. The Prophet (SAWA) and Ahlul Bayt (AS) guided the believers to Beal with their parents like a slave dealing with his masters. Such humbleness with parents grants you a status in this life and Hereafter. If you read the supplication for the parents in the Sahiba Sajjadia,bayou will see how we need to deal with our parents mistakes by complete submission and tolerance.

‘You must try your best to make your parents happy with you as they are your origin and the cause of your creation in this life.

‘Forget you ego in front of your parents and deal with them as an obedient servant as far as they don’t order you to do wrong.

Wassalam.

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Ramadan . Sawm (Fasting) . Anger

During Ramadan I intentionally broke my fast 5 times because I was angry and uncomfortable and felt that I do not need to fast. Do I have to do anything else other than making up the missed fasts?

You must do Qadha and also do the Kaffara of deliberately breaking the fast which is either fasting two months continuously or feeding sixty poor believers for every day of broken fast. You also need to seek forgiveness for that sin.

Wassalam.

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Father . Mother . Anger

I tried advising my father to be nice to my mother after he was rude to her. I did not intend to upset him but he still got angry. Will his anger affect my life? What can I do to protect myself if he gets angry again for no reason?

Rebecca Masterton, Dr Rebecca Masterton graduated with a BA in Japanese Language and Literature; an MA in Comparative East Asian and African Literature and a PhD in Islamic literature of West Africa. She has been... Answered 7 months ago

You may want to look on youtube at videos on narcissistic personality disorder. Rages can be a symptom of that. There are coaches on-line that teach you how to protect yourself. I can recommend Dr Ramani, Anna Runkle, and Dr Daniel Fox. Look up the 'grey rock' method. Also be careful that you are not being used emotionally by your mother as a 'flying monkey', or that you are being 'parentified' (i.e. your mother is the child and you are the parent that feels you have to protect her). Not saying that this is happening, but it is something to be aware of.

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God (Allah) . Anger

I am having abusive thoughts about Allah whenever I pray. I have recited A'udhubillah many times but it is still happening. I have cried a lot and don't know what to do. Is Allah angry with me?

Amina Inloes, Amina Inloes is originally from the US and has a PhD in Islamic Studies from the University of Exeter on Shi'a hadith. She is the program leader for the MA Islamic Studies program at the... Answered 9 months ago

Sorry to hear about your situation.

Allah is not angry with you. You sound like you are sincere and have a good heart, and these are the things that are important. Sometimes these thoughts pop up by themselves, or sometimes they are from shayateen. The best thing to do is just let the thoughts come and go on their own and remember that Allah does not blame us for things that are outside our control. Sometimes when we try not to think something, we end up thinking about it more. Also just do the salat as best as you can. You could also see if praying in a different location (like mosque, workplace, park, friend's house, etc) helps.

If you have some specific reason why you are upset with Allah (for instance, some people are upset when they lose a job, divorce, etc., as they blame Allah), this is something that is good to work through personally and spend some time sitting with Allah and doing dua or contemplating about to make peace about.

We have lots of ups and downs in our religious life, inshallah you will get through this too.

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Mother . Dream . Death . Anger

If I haven't see my mother in my dream after her death, while she has appeared in the dreams of other relatives, does that indicate her anger at me?

No - some people remember their dreams better than others or are more open to these things. Also you can't be sure that other people's dreams are actual communication, although sometimes you get an idea one way or the other.

Inshallah she would not have reasons to be angry to you after she has passed on - many things we are angry about in life become unimportant once we are not dealing with the material and social realities of this world. Allah also says in the Qur'an that He will remove bad feelings from people's hearts in jannah.

However if you are concerned that she is angry at you, you could pray that she forgives you.

Sorry to hear about your loss.

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Wife . Anger . Divorce

I divorced my wife three times in one sitting out of anger and frustration. Does it count as one or are we now fully divorced?

Zaid Alsalami, Shaykh Dr Zaid Alsalami is an Iraqi born scholar, raised in Australia. He obtained a BA from Al-Mustafa University, Qom, and an MA from the Islamic College in London. He also obtained a PhD from... Answered 1 year ago

Bismihi ta'ala

In Shi'i jurisprudence, divorce has multiple conditions and requirements.

1. You must specify what type of divorce it is.

2. She must not be in her menstrual cycle, and you cannot divorce her if you have been intimate with her, which means you must way until she finishes her next cycle.

3. The divorce must be conducted in front of at least 2 highly-pious men.

4. The divorce formulate must be recited in correct Arabic, in the correct form.

5. Only 1 divorce can be given, which means a three-fold divorce in one setting is invalid.

If are angry, suppress your anger and do not allow your anger to overwhelm you. Divorce is not to be done out of anger, and it is not an easy thing to do. When you are angry, observe the Islamic etiquette of what to do, and stay calm.

If you have not met these conditions, then you are not divorced.

And Allah knows best.

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Husband . Anger . Divorce

If a husband divorces in anger by saying Talaq thrice in front of his wife's mother and a daughter of her sister then is that Talaq valid or not?

Not valid at all.

'Talaq has many conditions to be valid one of them is not be in anger and must be witnessed by two pious men and many other conditions.

'Wassalam.

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God (Allah) . Anger . Meaning

I have heard that Allah becomes happy if we do good deeds and becomes angry when we do not follow His commands. Does this mean Allah has feelings?

Allah (SWT) is pleased with noble deeds done by His sincere servants, and is unhappy with sinful acts and wrong doers.

We should never think that Allah (SWT) has feelings like our feelings. Our feelings are based on benefit or loss and our thinking while Allah (SWT) is above any benefit or loss. The pleasure of Allah means His blessings on the sincere good doers. His anger is the result of bad deeds. Allah is The Absolute Needless and there is no question of any benefit nor loss or materialistic feelings.

Wassalam.

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Anger . Injustice

Looking at my life I really regret the way I treated my mother in law and put pressure on my husband against her. She has passed away and I now realise that my anger with her was unjust. I have lost a great opportunity to care for her. What can I do?

1. Recite Estighfaar for her e.g. Ya Allah, forgive her. Keep on seeking forgiveness for her as many times as you can.

2. Give Sadaqa and charity on her behalf.

3. Recite Quran and Du'a and Ziyarat on her behalf.

'Wassalam.

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Anger . Wife . Divorce

In a fit of anger I told my wife Talaq 3 times on an occasion when we had an argument. When I calmed down I regretted it. Does this count as a final divorce or is it revokable?

Such words of Talaq have no value nor any effect on your marriage bond. No doubt, it is wrong to say that but as it does not meet the conditions of Talaq, it has no value. Your marriage remains with out any change.

Wassalam.

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Anger . Family . Pain

I have recently realized that I have anger issues and am always losing my temper with my family. How should I act when I am in the heat of anger and pain? How can I avoid getting angry in the first place?

This is a big question - many people have challenges in their personalities or temperaments that are long-term projects to work on. However, here is something that you could consider and see if it has any helpful advice ("Imam Ali and Islamic Anger Management by Shaykh Mohamed Ali Ismail")

(I recall he did a workshop some years ago at an Islamic event on practical tips for anger management but I don't know if it is available online; you could try to find it)

Also if you haven't already, you could look through books such as this: https://www.al-islam.org/jami-al-saadat-collector-felicities-muhammad-mahdi-naraqi

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Wife . Phone . Anger . Divorce

If somebody gives Talaq to his wife over the phone 3 times in anger, does it count? What are the implications if he has twice pronounced Talaq earlier as well?

Talaaq has many conditions to be valid. Among the conditions are that
the husband should not be in the state of anger. So the Talaaq which
you mentioned in the state of anger is invalid.

There is another condition in every Talaaq which is that of two pious witnesses hearing
the declaration of Talaaq. Without this condition, no Talaaq is valid.
So the person who was speaking to his wife on phone and told her the
word of ‘Talaaq’, between him and her the Talaaq is invalid because no
two pious men witnessed it.

This person and his wife are still married.

Wassalaam.